Ever since my own diagnosis, I’ve been on the hunt for books by and about other women who also have ADHD – especially those who, like me, went most of their lives with absolutely no idea they had it. It’s a special type of trauma to spend your life feeling like all the things that are incredibly difficult for you (but not for anyone else around you) are entirely because of either character flaws or lack of willpower. Finally getting a diagnosis is one of the most complex emotional experiences of my life (other than love and motherhood, of course), fraught as it has been with a myriad of different (and often conflicting) emotions. But more than all of this, I have been realizing that I’ve spent most of my life feeling completely, irrevocably, painfully alone. I’ve always felt different, like I didn’t exist on quite the same wavelength as most of the people around me and that I’d never be able to both fit in while being myself. The only time in my life I’ve had this feeling recede is when I’m with my kid – who, as I now know, is more like me than I ever knew, as this is something else we share. I know some people who also have ADHD, but you can’t really ask people (especially those you don’t know that well) to sit down and spill their trauma and personal medical information. Even for people with ADHD, that’s asking a bit much. So I’ve been looking to my usual source for information and connection – books. I’ve been reading every memoir I can get my hands on by women who have been through a similar journey, and it’s been oddly healing. I’d never heard of Shaparak Khorsandi before, but I learned that she’s a comedian as well as being a woman with a late ADHD diagnosis, and I was instantly intrigued.
Like with anything in life, every neurodivergent person’s experience is unique, but there’s also common overlap areas. Though my own ADHD didn’t affect me in exactly the same ways, there was so much in Khorsandi’s memoir that I related to. She’s funny (of course), but also willing to open up and share all of the things ADHD has affected in her life, all the mistakes, bad decisions, challenges and frustrations. As funny as she is, her story is also heartbreaking in parts, as is pretty much every ADHD woman’s memoir I’ve read. I wanted to tell her it’s okay, that it’s not her fault and to give herself a break. I wanted to tell her I am right there in the ADHD trenches with her. I wanted to share stories and laugh about them. Mostly, I wanted to give her a hug.
Obviously, this book connected. Not the easiest read, but also a great one if you’re interested in Khorsandi or in the experiences of women with ADHD. And it did exactly what I wanted – it made me feel, at least while I was listening – a bit less alone. Like maybe, just maybe, I’m not the only one existing in this separate bubble of life with only a small area of overlap with the majority of people around me. And that, thank goodness, it’s okay to laugh about it (and cry, because there’s lots of that too). I’d highly recommend this book, ideally the audiobook version because Khorsandi reads it herself and it’s excellent.
Some brains, through no fault of their own, pack a bag, turn the lights off and run away to the seaside the moment they are meant to be doing homework, paying bills or not putting the cat in the fridge. These are ADHD brains. I have one and believe they are as common as being left-handed, flat footed or genuinely enjoying anchovies on a pizza. Undiagnosed Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder made my life a frustrating, maddening rollercoaster. I had very little focus except when I was hyper-focusing (and then it would always be on the wrong things), I made the same mistakes over and over again, regularly burning myself out until I was sobbing. When I finally was diagnosed in my 40s it felt like the lights had been turned on after a lifetime in the dark. Join much-loved comedian Shappi Khorsandi as she looks back on her life through the lens of ADHD and finally makes sense of the chaos. From discovering the joys of shoplifting through to finally understanding her attraction to toxic men, Scatter Brain will have you laughing (and crying) as you find out what it’s really like to live a life out of control. Whether you suspect you might have ADHD or you’re here to enjoy the ride, let Shappi take you on her hilarious journey of self-discovery where you just might learn something useful about yourself too! – Goodreads
Book Title: Scatter Brain
Author: Shaparak Khorsandi
Series: No
Edition: Audiobook
Published By: Vermillion
Released: September 1, 2023
Genre: Non-Fiction, Memoir, ADHD
Pages: 256
Date Read: July 24, 2024
Rating: 8/10
Average Goodreads Rating: 4.15/5 (239 ratings)
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